1. Bach was left-handed.
2. Bach was a convicted criminal. At one point in his life, he spent nearly a month in jail (November 6th to December 2nd, 1717). Rumour has it that this was punishment for writing "Where Sheep May Safely Graze".
3. Bach was a noted sprinter in his home town of Thüringen, and won medals at the hundred and two hundred yard dash. His time of 12.2 seconds for the hundred yard dash was not beaten for over fifty years.
4. Not only was Bach a keen sprinter, he was also an expert swordsman and sharpshooter. His legendary refusal to fight anyone unless he could be brought down to a more average level of ability by fighting right-handed is believed to be the inspiration for a similar scene in the cult movie The Princess Bride, in which Bach is believed to have been the model for the Dread Pirate Roberts.
5. History writes that Bach was born in Germany, but modern investigators are beginning to question whether in fact he was born in Sweden, due to the uncanny similarity between some of his music and that of Abba.
6. Bach married twice. The first to his cousin, Maria, the second marriage was to Anna Magdalena Wülkens. However, it is now believed that he also had relations with and fathered children of a local bar maid called Helga Schümaker, who bore him an unknown number of children.
7. Bach was a well-known and respected organist, and developed many advances in organ technology. These included the Schlicken-grüber, which enabled performance on three keyboards at the same time without a loss of hot air; and the undeservedly much maligned thirteen foot stop, known as the Pitten-Stüppend.
8. Bach fathered more than a score of children, and has many descendants who are alive today, and who are famous in their own artistic fields. They include Catherine Bach (actress), Richard Bach (writer), Australian children's performer Paul Paddick, and Engelbert Humperdinck (performer).
9. Bach went blind. The cause is reputed to have been nocturnal activities by candlelight that were banned by his father.
10. Bach was lost at sea, and his time and place of death remains uncertain. Legend has it he left the Port of Bremerhaven for a three hour tour, and never returned. His six companions, who included a notable millionaire, a professor, and a movie star were not recovered either.
NOTE: The above article may not be entirely accurate.
4 comments:
If not entirely accurate, it's still good for a chuckle or two!
A less well-known Bach quote: "It's three days to Good Friday. I have a full barrel of beer, a half-finished Passion, it's dark, and I'm wearing sunglasses."
-Jaakko Mäntyjärvi
Maybe P.D.Q. was one of the kids he had by Helga.
I have reason to believe that Bach was the real composer behind the emotionally intense "Abba" pop classic "Geben Sie mich geben mich geben mir einen Mann nach Mitternacht."
The similarities between the above "Abba" (yeah, right) tune and "Jesu, Meine Freude" clarifies the truth of the matter. Abba were obviously simply fraudsters ripping off the genius of this pop tune master.
Bach. Obviously Swedish.
Abba. Obviously plagiarists.
The proof is in the pudding.
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